Thursday, August 31, 2006

So what else is new...?

Yes, folks, I AM alive, though barely. As of now, I'm 'off the clock', as it were, here at work while one of my two newest employees gives a closing shift a try on his own. Therefore, I have a little time to catch you up on my little life.

Basically, things are the same around here: wake up, get dressed, get showered, drive to work, work, home, eat, sleep, lather rinse repeat. The three kids are a mere five days away from the start of the school year, so they're all excited. WTF?? Where did the summer go? I swear it was June 1st just yesterday and here we're knocking on the door at September already? What did I miss? Obviously a LOT.

I received my ring on Monday from my wonderful hubby, which I now sport proudly (the ring, not my hubby, get your minds out of the gutter, eh?!! lol!!). I'm so paranoid that I will scratch, bleach or otherwise maim this thing. I can't begin to tell you how much I love this little band of tri-coloured gold! I can't stop looking at it and squeeing (no, that's not a typo, every time I look at it I go SQUEEEE!!). It fits so perfectly and it looks so nice on my hand :)

In 15 days, Hubby and I are going to see Pete and Roger!! I can't wait! We're going to make a day of it... I get off work at 2 and we're going to go to dinner and then to the concert. Hoping we can get a hold of Parentals to keep and eye on the kids so we don't have to worry about hiring a babysitter that we really don't need, cuz Peej is 13 now but is still a little green in the baby sitting department to do any real night sitting.

*sigh* what else is new? Not too much. I went away for the weekend a couple of weeks ago, and have decided that I'm a relationship/visiting friend jinx. Without going into much detail, I witness the partial dissolution of a relationship, the torching of a friends' only vehicle and I'm telling you, I've seen more of Toronto than I care too EVER AGAIN!!! All in all, it was a great weekend, but I don't think I want to do all that by myself anymore. Best to take Hubby along for moral support and directional assistance! LOL!!

Yikes, once again, I've written a novel, and I think I've run out of things to say for now. Hope everyone is having a GRAND week, and will continue said grand week all the way through the long weekend!

Tuesday, August 22, 2006

*stamps foot impetuously* But I wanted to HELP!!

Okay, first of all, soy chocolate milk is my new best friend...

Second of all, something happened this evening that definitely rated a 9.0 on my weird-shit-o-meter...

Driving home around 6:15, I was just getting to Kanata, when, about four car lengths ahead of me, a rusty brown Volvo suddenly veers off to the left and crashes into the ditch. Whoa. So, being the Good Samaritan (yeah yeah wrong religion, just go with it, k?) I fancy myself to be, I immediately skid into the shoulder, put my hazards on and reach for my cell phone, prepared to call 911 if necessary. A City of Ott*awa employee pulled in behind me, obviously doing the same thing I was doing: making sure this person wasn't hurt. I was jogging towards him, motioning to the car that I didn't know what was going on, but was en route to find out. I had JUST reached the C.O.O. guy when he turned, and we both watched, dumbfounded, as this white-haired old geezer backed his now even MORE banged up old clunker out of the ditch and squealed away, leaving the C.O.O. and I staring at each other in bewilderment. Whaddafuck just happened? I shrugged and the C.O.O. guy kind of chuckled at me as I said "Idunno, I guess he didn't want help, eh?". We concluded that either he was blind as a bat and accidentally slipped off the highway, he fell asleep at the wheel or he was, as my Dad so eloquently put it "Pissed as a newt". We figure it was probably the last, and knowing that he'd get caught driving drunk, he got out of there as soon as he cleared the fuzzies out of his skull long enough to find the little. white. lines.

He sped past us without so much as a glance in our direction. You're welcome you collosally ungrateful schmuck. I hope next time you veer that car into a rock cut. In the middle of Bumfuck Nowhere where no one passes. NYAH :P

Some people's children. SHEESH!!!

Monday, August 14, 2006

Happily married, and now it will be evident!

It's a little thicker, and the band itself is white, not yellow gold, and the basket weave part is brushed gold, so it's not quite so shiny, but ladies and gentlemen, in less than two weeks I will be sporting this beauty!!

Saturday, August 12, 2006

Weird f***ing weekend!!

Having copious amounts of al-ca-ma-ho-hollllll with M and T in TO. Has definitely been one of the more interesting 48 hours of my life. Suffice it to say that I've seen way too much of this stupid city for my liking (yes, I got lost, smartasses).

Will update everyone when I get home (or when I get to work on Monday morning).

B*B

I'm going to have a GOOD time tonight, dammit (censor up the hilt cuz there's a 12 year old present dammit).

Ciao all!!

Monday, August 07, 2006

Tending the Fire, being a grrl with The Bear

It was a truly magical night, here at the McFly Farm (heh, okay, so it's not a farm and our last name isn't McFly). We started out with the whole fam damily, roasting marshmallows and making smores around our 'new' little potbellied outdoor stove, and then I splashed some white sage on the still-glowing coals, which actually re-lit the entire fire! Hubby was a little perplexed because there really wasn't much left on the grate to re-ignite, but it did!

Then The Bear and I prepared for our night out under the stars. The forecast was calling for a 60% chance of rain and/or thundershowers, so the first thing we did is pray for NO RAIN.

We got it. It was clear all night and the crickets, the little toads and the nightingales sang us to sleep after a reading of an adaptation of Anne of Green Gables and a look through The Bear's Fairyopolis book. I remember the last thing I thought: Bless├Ęd Mother, thank you for my little girl.

Our awakening was less than serene however. Without going into details, we had to vacate the tent pretty quickly this morning, and the magic seemed to vanish with the dawn. Hubby was waiting in the kitchen to 'welcome us home'. He'd been awake since 5:45 and we stumbled into the house around 6:30.

Aw well. My last day off of this long weekend and I'm waiting for the wash to stop so I can put it all out on the line. The kids are going to Canada's Wonderland with their grandparents (Hubby's Mom and Dad) tomorrow for three days, so getting things ready for them this week is going to be my goal today. Have a good Civic Holiday, fellow Canucks!

Sunday, August 06, 2006

Witchy Wiles

While my beautiful daughter watches Practical Magic, and the scent of last night's bonfire still lingers around the neighbourhood (neighbours had a party across the way with a huge bonfire in the middle of their backyard), I'm finding myself wishing I hadn't been so sick at Fest. All I've wanted to do for months now is commune with Mother and feel Her presence. The Bear and I will be spending the night camping in our backyard tonight, and I can't wait. I'm going to find my BOS in my closet and dust off a few spells. I've denied the witch in me for so long, it's about time she came back out of the closet herself! The full moon is but a few days away, and there are things that must be done, in my opinion, to strengthen things around myself and my home/family.

I wonder sometimes how I can call myself witch, when the tedium of the mundane life still seems to choke every fabric of my being of late. The Goddess knows my toils, I'm sure... in fact, I think it is She who puts these obstacles in my path from time to time just to see if I'm paying attention. I AM paying attention. I just can't seem to fit Her in my daily life like I KNOW I need to.

So, today, not being a particularly important day, I vow to play my part as Her emmissary and start acting like the witch I am.

And now that I've declared that to no one in particular, I'm going to go take a shower and send Peej out to mow the front lawn...heh.

Friday, August 04, 2006

Linkage

Well...

DUHHHHHHHHH!

Why Women Are Crabby

*yes, I know I've posted this in my old blog, but I thought it was time to bring it out of blothmogs (mothballs for blogs?)...*

We started to "bud" in our blouses at 9 or 10 years old only to find that
anything that came in contact with those tender, blooming buds hurt so bad
it brought us to tears. So came the ridiculously uncomfortable training
bra contraption that the boys in school would snap until we had calluses on
our backs.

Next, we get our periods in our early to mid-teens (or sooner). Along
with those budding boobs, we bloated, we cramped, we got the hormone
crankies, had to wear little mattresses between our legs or insert
tubular, packed cotton rods in places we didn't even know we had.

Our next little rite of passage (premarital or not) was having sex for the
first time which was about as much fun as having a ramrod push your uterus
through your nostrils (IF he did it right and didn't end up with his
little cart before his horse), leaving us to wonder what all the fuss
was about.

Then it was off to Motherhood where we learned to live on dry crackers and
water for a few months so we didn't spend the entire day leaning over
Brother John. Of course, amazing creatures that we are (and we are), we
learned to live with the growing little angels inside us steadily kicking
our innards night and day making us wonder if we were preparing to have
Rosemary's Baby.

Our once flat bellies looked like we swallowed a watermelon whole and we
pee'd our pants every time we sneezed. When the big moment arrived, the
dam in our blessed Nether Regions invariably burst right in the middle of
the mall and we had to waddle, with our big cartoon feet, moaning in pain
all the way to the ER.

Then it was huff and puff and beg to die while the OB says, "Please stop
screaming, Mrs. Hearmeroar. Calm down and push. Just one more good push
(more like 10),"warranting a strong, well-deserved impulse to punch the
%*#!* doctor (and hubby) square in the nose for making us cram a wiggling,
mushroom-headed 10lb bowling ball through a keyhole.

After that, it was time to raise those angels only to find that when all
that "cute" wears off, the beautiful little darlings
morphed into walking, jabbering, wet, gooey, snot-blowing, life-sucking
little poop machines.

Then come their "Teen Years." Need I say more?

When the kids are almost grown, we women hit our voracious sexual prime in
our early 40's - while hubby had his somewhere around his 18th birthday.

So we progress into the grand finale: "The Menopause," the Grandmother of
all womanhood. It's either take HRT and chance cancer in those now
seasoned "buds" or the aforementioned Nether Regions, or, sweat like a hog
in July, wash your sheets and pillowcases daily and bite the head off
anything that moves.

Now, you ask WHY women seem to be more spiteful than men, when men get off
so easy, INCLUDING the icing on life's cake: Being able to pee in the woods without soaking
their socks...

So, while I love being a woman, "Womanhood" would make the Great Gandhi a
tad crabby. Women are the "weaker sex"? Yeah right. Bite me.

Thursday, August 03, 2006

V for Vendetta, my review

T, you wanted to know how this movie was? I have but two words for you...

Fecking. BRILLIANT.

Now taking my blown-away ass to bed, cuz dammit, I have to work in the morning!!! I will dream of blood-red roses and of that face... oh, and of Keira Knightly too, she's HAWT!!!

The Purina Diet (no, I'm NOT going to try this!!)

I have a Golden retriever & I was buying a large bag of Purina at
Wal-Mart and was in line to check out.

A woman behind me asked if I had a dog. On impulse, I told her that no,
I was starting The Purina Diet again, although I probably shouldn't
because I'd ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50
pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out
of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.

I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that
it works is to load your pants pockets with Purina nuggets and simply
eat one or two every time you feel hungry & that the food is
nutritionally complete so I was going to try it again.

I have to mention here that practically everyone in the line was by now
enthralled with my story, particularly a guy who was behind her.

Horrified, she asked if I'd ended up in the hospital in that condition
because I had been poisoned. I told her no; it was because I'd been
sitting in the street licking my balls and a car hit me.

I thought one guy was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so
hard as he staggered out the door.

Edited to add: Sorry, *I* did not do this...I got this little gem in an email yesterday and had to share it, I thought it was too hilarious not to share!

Wednesday, August 02, 2006

Summer Solstice Dance

I don't know why, but I started watching this, and I burst into tears.

Damnable hormones...